Thank you sis Hidayati for the photos! I’ll take up your offer of snapping shots with a DSLR for our next event 🙂
Participants & support group mothers
My 3 participants with their 'babies' 😀
Hoping to create more bf awareness in the community
Sis Faeza sharing her bit of bf experience
“You need to let your friends know that childbirth is not an illness.” – my very supportive husband
Everytime I get psychologically-drained from having to hear or deal about obgyns who medicalise childbirth too much, I remember my husband’s words above. Yes it is true that hospitals and doctors here have a certain medical model for childbirth. And honestly, it can be really emotionally and mentally draining when you have to work with an obgyn like this, but as my mentor puts it: “These are the mothers [with this kind of obgyn] who really need your help.”
I met a really tough obgyn last week, and it almost drained all my doula soul out (like dementors of Harry Potter!), but the wise words of my husband and mentor have spurred me to soldier on because I have a duty to do so for my community. InsyaAllah, please pray for me!
During a recent meet with a potential client, I was told that her doctor had given her a choice to be induced on the 11th of January 2011, so the baby can have a ‘nice’ birthdate of 11/01/11 about a week short of her EDD. Needless to say I was taken aback (but didn’t show my reaction of course). Shocked also because she talked so casually about it and seemed to be considering that offer.
Now, I am not judging any mothers who opted for induction. I have had several mothers myself who were either induced or labour augmented because they were overdue or had other high risk medical reasons. That is a different thing. What I am saddened about is when doctors make early induction offers to mothers who have had a good and healthy pregnancy, and make it sound as if it is the most natural thing to do. Now remember that these first time mothers know no better because their doctors don’t really discuss the medical risks that entail an induction.
So Bismillah, for my community’s sake, here’s why you should try to avoid an early induction as much as you can help it…
– You might think that there’s no difference between birthing a baby at 39 weeks and 40 weeks (especially when you’re so tired by that time and all you want is to get the baby out!), but just an extra week of baby being in the uterus can make a significant impact on baby’s lung and brain capacity. Now don’t you want the best headstart for your baby?
– Last few weeks of pregnancy are most critical to baby’s lung and brain development. Some complications that may arise for elective deliveries between 37-39 weeks include among others: increased NICU admissions, increased feeding problems (difficult to establish breastfeeding) and increased respiratory distress.
– I’d like to touch on pitocin (synthetic oxytocin) – the drug they give you to induce contractions – but that would take another whole blog entry. Briefly put, this articifial hormone, while it mimics your own, is very different from naturally produced oxytocin from your body because it does not cross your blood-brain barrier. Why is this important? When a contraction gets intense, natural oxytocin crosses your blood-brain barrier so another ‘pain-relieving’ hormone known as endorphins (also known as happy hormones) can be released as your body’s natural pain-killers. But with pitocin, you don’t get this same dose of endorphins to counter the pain and intensity, so most of the time, the mother will want an epidural~
InsyaAllah we will discuss about epidural soon! Comments are most welcome 🙂
Alhamdulillah, my first breastfeeding basics workshop turned out to be quite a success even though we only had 4 attendees. I am happy and confident enough to conduct another one at a larger scale soon. Special thanks go to sisters Hidayati & Faeza, who assisted me in my workshop. I wanted to mention this earlier, but forgot to, so I’ll post it here instead: The most special thanks go to my mother, Halimah, for being the main advocate and support for my breastfeeding journey. She also encouraged me to contribute back to the community in little ways that I can, therefore dear Mak, this first breastfeeding workshop of mine is specially dedicated to you. Thank you very much and I love you!
After the workshop, we had a small gathering session for ‘officers’ of the Breastfeeding Muslim Mothers’ Support Group at my house. It was a simple yet cosy get-together with about 9 of us, and we managed to sort out some affairs, mainly focusing on breastfeeding outreach to more Muslim mothers. Do you have any ideas you can contribute to make this possible? Comments are most welcomed!
If you’re pregnant and would like to attend the next session (possibly sometime in early February), email me at doulahanani@gmail.com. You can also request to join our support group in Facebook. More details soon! 🙂
I was at a birth that had a labour taking more than 36hrs long (I was with the mother for a good 16hrs+). Things were slow to pick up even at the hospital and the baby didn’t want to go into the optimal birthing position (occipital anterior) no matter what position we tried her in. The possibility of a c-sect was looming not too far away. As a last resort, I encouraged the father to sit close to his wife’s belly and recite every prayer (du’a) he could think of.
Not too long after, things suddenly picked up and there was hope for a normal birth. The medical staff called it a sudden ‘twist of fate’. I chose to see it as the power of a prayer. This image of the loving father softly whispering to the mother’s belly coaxing his child to come out will forever be etched on my mind.
I am very excited to have been given the opportunity to conduct my very first breastfeeding basics workshop on the 6th Nov organised by Breastfeeding Muslim Mothers Support Group (BMMSG). If you are pregnant and curious to know more about breastfeeding, please come!
Via Breastfeeding Muslim Mothers Support Group:
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Dear beloved sisters,
A group of us have decided to organise this support group’s first event! It will be a morning workshop on breastfeeding basics for pregnant mothers or new mothers just learning to breastfeed, and followed by a casual lunch gathering for anyone else interested to meet up, chat, and talk about breastfeeding! Tots welcomed too, details below!
When? Next Saturday! 6 Nov 2010
10am – 1pm
Breastfeeding Basics Workshop by Doula Hanani
1pm – 3pm
Breastfeeding Muslim Mothers Support Group Gathering!
What?
For the first part ie the workshop, Hanani will cover the following
Intro & Welcome
Myths abt Breastfeeding
Why breastfeed? & other facts
How breastfeeding works
Breastfeeding problems
Q&A
What to bring?
It will be a potluck lunch so if you can manage, bring something simple and healthy! Fruits, sandwiches, salad and finger food are some ideas.
Please RSVP (email to nurhidayati@gmail.com) for the workshop, gathering or both. We need a min of 5 mothers to run the workshop so please please indicate interest quickly if you are a pregnant or new mom interested in learning about breastfeeding. You can also bring your mother/helper, but lets keep this ladies only so we can freely exchange our questions etc.
Hope to see you!
***
All praises to Allah, I’ve finally managed to complete a huge part of my website… even though it is nowhere near complete, I hope the little nuggets of info I have here can help to answer some basic questions people might have. Click on the links above to find out more about what I do!
Some updates:
I am very excited at the prospect of gaining knowledge from a well known US doula come Saturday. According to her website The Birth Company, Rae has been a doula for over 30 years! I’ve only been a doula a little less than a year yet I feel I’ve gained so much new info and learned so many new things. I’m really looking forward to having this sharing session with Rae. Thank you Ginny for organising!
Also, SUTRA magazine (a malay SPH publication) had been kind enough to interview me for their next issue in November. Even though I am a very new doula in Singapore, I do hope what little I shared with the magazine will help to create more awareness about the works of a doula to the Malay community~ Am pretty excited and anxious at the same time wondering how the posed photos will turn out. Don’t forget to get your copy of SUTRA magazine everyone! 🙂
Letter of Agreement Describing Labor Support Services, Limitations, and Fees
As a Doula, I accompany women in labor to help ensure a safe and satisfying birth experience. I draw upon my knowledge and experience to provide emotional support, physical comfort and communication with your health care provider to ensure you have the information needed to make informed decisions in labor. I can provide reassurance and perspective to you and your partner, make suggestions for labor progress, and help with relaxation, massage, positioning and other techniques for comfort. I am independently self-employed. As your doula, I am working for you, not your care giver or hospital/birth center.
Choosing a Doula I prefer to meet with you and your partner at least once before labor to become acquainted, to explore and discuss your priorities or concerns, and to plan how we might best work together. At that time, we can discuss fees. This initial meeting does not obligate you to use my services.
If you choose to select me as your doula, I will want to become familiar with your plans for labor, birth and postpartum. I will also want to know your own best ways of coping with pain and fatigue and how you and your partner foresee working together. I will also inform you of times that I am not available for labor support and will do my best to ensure my availability for your labor and birth. We may also decide on other meetings and will certainly want to remain in touch by telephone.
As a doula, I do not perform clinical tasks, such as blood pressures, fetal assessments, vaginal exams, etc. I am present to provide for your physical comfort, emotional support and advocacy. I won’t make decisions for you. I will help you get the information necessary to make an informed decision.
When you are in labor, I prefer that you call me when you think you are in labor, even if you do not yet need me. I can answer questions and make suggestions over the phone. We will decide at this time whether I should come to your home right then or wait for further change. I usually need at least thirty minutes to an hour to get to you from the time you request my presence. Except for extraordinary circumstances, I will remain with you throughout your labor and birth.
After birth, I usually remain with you for one to two hours, unless you are comfortable and your family is ready for private time together. I can also assist you with breastfeeding, if necessary. I am available for phone contact to answer any questions you may have. I would like to meet one last time within one two weeks following your birth to see how you are doing, to review the birth, to admire your baby, and to get feedback from you about my role.
If I am unable to attend your birth, there will be no charge for my services and I will refund the retaining fee. I will make every effort to provide the services described here. Sometimes, this is impossible (ie, a rapid labor and birth). If I am not called, the retaining fee will be kept but there will be no further charges.
My fees for these services as described is $______ is due within two weeks of your estimated due date, unless special arrangements are made in advance.
I/we have read this letter of agreement describing the doula’s services and agree it reflects the discussion we had with her.
Mother______________ Partner________________
Doula_______________ Date_________________
Yaqyn Birth (Doula Hanani) 